(Board) Game Day
I admit that I often long for my college days when a group of us in the dorm would gather together for an impromptu day or night of social networking of the old-school sort - board gaming. Sitting around a gaming table, eating chips, drinking soda, and talking trash for hours on end did wonders for my stressed out soul back in those days of tedious coursework, all-night study sessions, and grueling final exams. And I carry those memories with me to this day, all the while coveting them like precious jewels and wishing for those early, simpler days. Today scheduling a day-long gaming session with even one of my close friends, much less three of them, is tough, to say the least.
After much effort and gnashing of teeth, my buddies Bill and Mike, and my younger brother Mark and I finally were able to get together for a day of serious gaming that didn’t involve a computer screen or television. And it was glorious. 
The first game that we dug into was one that Bill, Mark, and I had played once before at Christmas called Ticket to Ride - Europe. The original Ticket to Ride game was a winner of the German Game of the Year award (the Spiel des Jahres), and deservedly so, as this followup game is simply well-designed and terribly fun.
The board is a map of Europe, with a good number of cities represented and potential train routes between the cities. Each route is made up of one to eight train cars and is of a particular color. In order to lay claim to a route, you must play train cards that match the color and number of the train cars that are shown on the route. Once you claim a route, you score the points for that route, and play proceeds to the next player. You can draw ticket cards during play, also, and these cards show routes which you want to lay claim to if at all possible, as the point value shown on the card will count for your total when it comes time to figuring out who won, and will count against your total if you don’t fulfill the route. There are also colorless routes, tunnels, and ferry routes with special rules, along with special train station pieces you can put in play that allow you to use your opponents track to help you fill a ticket card route. All in all, a terrific little game, and terribly inspirational for me personally as I futz around with Duello and Bethellowed.
Now, even though three of the four of us had actually played the game once, that by no means gave us an advantage over Mike. On the contrary, after we reread the rules for the game we quickly found a mistake we had made during the last gaming session which completely changed the game play. In this case the rule read that we must take one of the following four actions during any given turn, when we had read the rule to read you must take as many as possible of the following four actions during any given turn. Er…oops. I had won spectactularly the last time, and managed to lose just as spectactularly this time around. Sonofabitch. I fared much better the second time we played yesterday, however, kicking ass and taking names and winning by a fair margin. No one lays track like I do and I made sure those bastards wouldn’t forget it soon.
After a couple games of Ticket to Ride, we decided to try out a variant of Risk that my wife and I gave to my brother as a gift a couple of years ago called Risk - The Lord of the Rings - Trilogy Edition. Now, it would be easy to hear the title of the game and just dismiss it offhand as another example of “the man” slapping some intellectual property on an existing game and shipping it for a fast buck. However, we found that the game was surprisingly different from the Risk game we had grown up playing, not the least of which was the (in my opinion) considerably more interesting and strategic map that is used for the game. I just found it tougher during my admittedly limited exposure to the game to play conservatively, building up my forces until I could pounce. The addition of sea ports allowing distant forces to attack, along with cards you earn during the game that allow you really mess with your opponents, definitely spiced up the game and gave it new life.
Now, having said that, I have a confession to make. I would rather play a less-confrontational multiplayer game such as Ticket to Ride than Risk, and the reason is pretty simple: When I start getting a head of steam and feel like I’m on the verge of a breakthrough, inevitably two or more of my opponents also realize that I’m about to breakthrough and decide to form a coalition with the express intent of putting me back in my place. I know that it makes sense to do so, but that does not stop me from feeling like I’m being victimized. And yesterday’s marathon Risk game (five hours - wow) was no different.
I had managed to play conservatively for the first few turns while my three opponents managed to tear each other new one’s repeatedly. They were in disarray, and I was slowly, but surely, gathering my forces and pushing northward into elven territory. I was playing as one of the Evil players (note the capital ‘E’ and I didn’t let them forget it the whole game), and nothing we Evil players like more than seeing hobbits and elves on skewers, roasting on an open fire, I can tell you.
Between the three of us, Bill, Mark, and I had managed to pretty much decimate poor Mike’s forces. Mike was caught in the middle of a vicious ground war between Mark and Bill, and I kept picking away at his territories on the peripherary as I built up my power base. Actually, I call what Mark and Bill were engaged in a ground war, but really it was more like a pissing contest between two drunken sailors or something. Bill tore Mark up early in the game, and Mark decided from that moment on that his definition of winning the game was preventing Bill from winning the game. Nice. And so it went…until I woke up and took Mike out of the game in about two turns.
Of course, as I mentioned, this is where the inevitable happened, and Mark and Bill decided that they’d put their differences aside long enough to take me out of the game before continuing with their hostilities. Nothing more aggravating than watching your carefully-constructed defenses get taken down in one long, agonizing turn as each of your opponents tear into you with an (in my opinion) undeserved veangance. Luckily, they made the decision to attack me one turn too late in the game to save themselves, as in this variant the One Ring can end the game early by arriving at Mount Doom, and after my turn was over it decided to do just that. Whew. Because if it hadn’t ended the game right then and there, I was done.
All in all, it was a great ten hours or so of gaming, joking, drinking, and eating, and I cannot wait until the next time we can put such a session together. I love video gaming, and with the advent of voice-over-internet utilities such as Skype and TeamSpeak, it certainly makes it easier to get together for a play session with friends in far-distant lands. But nothing beats playing with your friends around a game table - nothing.
No, seriously…shoot them
In my last entry I suggested that the gaming world might be a better place if we simply removed the hardcore gamers from the gene pool. Let’s visit the wonderful world of hardcore gamer angst once again and see how our intrepid adventurers are surviving on server maintenance day.
Here we find the hardcore gamer hard at work trying to bring down the World of Warcraft forums with inane chatter while Blizzard performs its weekly scheduled server maintenance. This week is especially interesting in WoW-land because there is a reputed item duplication bug that Blizzard now has to track down and investigate, thus causing an extended downtime for the servers.
Now, let me try to set the picture for you here and make sure that you understand the context in which I am posting this picture. Every week when Blizzard performs the server maintenance, without exception, you will see umpteen thousand post on the WoW forums from the ne’er-do-well hardcore gamer asking when the servers will be back up.
Every. Single. Week.
This is due to the widely known, yet underreported iliveandbreathethis virus that afflicts untold numbers of hardcore gamers. The only known cure for these poor unfortunate souls is to allow them access to a public forum where they can pound unmercifully on their keyboards for hours on end in a vain attempt to convince Blizzard to “bring up the gawd-damned servers NOW or they will cancel their eight accounts!!!!1!!one!!”.
So, when Blizzard announces that there is going to now be *extended* downtime… well, let’s just say that it is not a pleasant day to be visiting the WoW forums and leave it at that, shall we?
Let’s take a look at some of the juiciest subjects on the forums in that picture. There are those that feel that the item duplication bug will cause a rollback of the servers, which would mean players losing untold hours worth of work (”no choice but to rollback”). Then there are those that think those people are idiots and should die a horrible death for even proposing that a rollback is imminent (”to the idiots saying rollback + rested exp”). Of course, there are the occasional clueless newbs who only wish that they could be as elite as the hardcore gamers who are chatting about a rollback (”whats rollback? can someone please tell me?”). And then you have your sleepy-eyed hardcore gamer who likely just woke up from a marathon 96-hour play session during which he did not move once from his chair, instead choosing to simply eat, drink, and shit where he sat while he simultaneously ran three different characters on three different computers. And then of course chose to post a whole new topic in the forums rather than fucking read the forums (”i just got on… what the heck is going on??”).
Then you have your plain and simple angry gamers. Life is not fair, and these folks pull no punches in making sure that Blizzard (and everyone else) fucking knows it (”fix the god damned servers”, “rollback?! … then rollback my money too !”, and “Blizzards Customer support…s nothing?”). And last, but not least for certain, you have the sad and lonely hardcore gamer who just wants everyone to get along (”i just want to play”).
Well, there you have it folks. It’s a sad day for gamers everywhere, or as we in the real world like to say, “It’s Tuesday”.
